Etiquette Q&A: What to Do When Your Fiancé Isn't Invited

Photo Credit: Lucky Me Photography on Lela via Lover.ly

Q: I was surprised to receive an invitation to a friend’s wedding that only had my name on it. She knows I’m engaged and has met my fiancé a few times. Shouldn’t his name be on the invitation as well? 

A: Definitely! In fact, the rule of thumb is to invite the partner of anyone who is married, engaged, living with someone or in a relationship of six months or more. If you do happen to be living together, then his name should have been written beneath yours on the envelope. If he has his own place, your friend should have asked you for his address and sent him an invitation. Perhaps she assumes that you will both attend or she inadvertently omitted his name. Either way, it wouldn’t hurt to find out. Thank her for the invitation and ask if your fiancé is also invited: “I know the invitation is addressed only to me, but I assume my fiancé is invited as well and just want to confirm this with you.” If she isn’t inviting him, she’ll need to explain this etiquette “don’t,” and possibly reconsider.

—Diane Forden